As we approach the end of 2015, many of us will be starting to think about setting our New Years Resolutions. Statistics show that although millions of people make resolutions, 80% of these are doomed to failure. Don’t despair though – I have some useful tips for actually sticking to your resolutions this time and a great way for setting those goals to make your dreams come true.
When deciding on your goal: it must be a big enough challenge to excite you, yet not so enormous that you can’t see yourself achieving it. Plan ahead, don’t leave it until New Years Day. Measure your progress each week, rewarding yourself for achievements along the way. Treat each failure as a temporary setback and get right back on track. Break each major goal into smaller steps and get started, one small step at a time. Write out your major goals each day, so they are fresh in your mind and you can decide what steps you are going to take today.
My gift today is a process that helps you set goals in a way that helps you to believe and achieve them. Read on for my goal-setting exercise.
Allowing the future – IDENTIFYING YOUR GOAL
“What specifically do you want?”
“Where are you now?”
“How will you know when you have it?”
“What will you see when you have it?”
“What will you hear when you have it?”
“What physical sensations will be present when you have it?”
“What will you feel inside (what will your emotions be) when you have it?”
“What will you say to yourself when you have it?”
“What will this outcome get for you or allow you to do?”
“Have you ever had or done this before?”
“Do you know anyone who has?”
“Can you act as if you already have it?”
“What daily action could you take until you have received it?”
“How will you know if you are on course?”
“How will you know if you are off course?”
“What actions can you take if you are off course?”
Answer the following questions in as much detail as possible. The entire scene should be described from the perspective of having already achieved your goal, and that you are now enjoying the spoils.
- Now that you have achieved your goal, what pictures or images do you see
out there (i.e. not internal pictures)?
E.g.: I’m standing watching the waves crash on the beach. I see the water dancing and the spray flying high into the air. The sunlight is beautiful. It creates a sparkling effect on the water. The people
around me are smiling, everyone is enjoying the holiday. Children are building sandcastles on the beach.
2. Now that you have achieved your goal, what sounds and voices do you hear
3. Now that you have achieved your goal, what sensations do you feel out there?
Focus on non-emotion feelings e.g. how warm you feel in the sunshine.
4. Next, again from the perspective of having achieved your goal, describe what you see internally. What pictures do you see inside your mind?
5. Describe what you hear internally. What are you saying to yourself?
6. Describe what you feel inside. Describe the emotions you feel now that you’ve achieved the goal. Be very detailed. Be sure to add in feelings of gratitude for having received this , become this or experienced this.
MAKING YOUR GOAL A REALITY (Setting your goal)
Now it’s time to clearly define your goal, using the present tense. Use language that motivates and excites you.
“It is (date that you want this goal to be achieved)……………………………………………………….
and I now allow myself to (e.g. weigh 9 stone, be a size 12, have the new job)………………………………………..
I’m (set the scene – where are you? Who are you with? What’s the evidence that you’ve achieved your goal?)…………………… and I feel: ………………………………………….”.
If you would like my help and advice over the Christmas period, do visit my website www.thesinglemumssurvivalguide.com, where you can find a free audio on Coping with Christmas or sign up for a free one to one session with me.